Tuesday, February 27, 2007
i've been thinking about some of the things that i've been facing recently. i worry alot that i'm not prepared for them. that i'm not properly putting on "the armor" for the daily battles. but what does that really mean? i know the descriptions that are offered to us through the new testament, but i really started thinking about battles and fighting sin. i feel like it's something i'm constantly doing. always staring in the eyes of my enemies and thinking about what my next move will be against them. i think we as christians do this so much. we focus our gaze on the enemy and our minds are set on the battle, but thats not where we should be looking. why are we not setting our gaze on Christ? why am i not focusing on Him? this unbelievably simple point hit me harder than a rock. i dont need to focus on what i'm fighting against, i need to focus on my Redeemer. the one who fights for me. it says so in hebrews 12:1-2:
Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,
looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. (NKJV)
i dont want to constantly fight my battles. staring in the eyes of my enemies and my weaknesses does me no good. i should be staring into the eyes of the Holy and perfect one. setting my eyes on the goal that is before me and never looking back. He is the author and finisher of my faith, my life, my existence. i will set my eyes on Him and nothing else, allowing Him to fight for me, because i know He will be victorious. as i yoke myself unto God, i'm allowing Him to take over the work. i'm tired, but He never grows weary. this is good to know.
my procrastination has reached an all-time high.
here i sit in the library, with about a million things to do.
and what am i doing?
oh i'm on myspace.
thinking about how i need a haircut soon.
about church this morning.
(and its overwhelming restoration)
about this dumb poem
that i have to present on.
["symptoms of love" robert graves]
about the radio dept. and how i like them.
about radiant and my brothers.
about how i just missed a call from my mom.
about my relationships.
and how i wish i had more to give.
about how scared i am to graduate
but how much i'm anticipating it.
back to analyzing literature...
which is the current story of my life.
it is NEVER ok to wear pajamas to the grocery store.
or for that matter, in public at all.
and it is especially never ok to wear pajama pants
with a leather bomber that was probably made in 1982.
as you buy tv dinners and store-brand potato chips.
this combination of things can only result in living alone with cats.
many, many cats.
i can only assume that the woman who was doing this
lives alone with all of her cats
and is probably a star wars fan.